with burnt sage and a forest of bygones

i tried to make it feel photoboothy but who are we fooling. i'm spending every waking second with my stupid cat. make it count. he sleeps folded up like a pretzel against my arm, nose pressed to my hand and if i move just a little bit he'll lick my knuckle and mewl in protest. my heart breaks everytime i look at him, i hate being so attached to an animal that i'll never see again in three weeks. not even ten years with our fat old tabby at home have compared to the four months raising a kitten and teaching him not to pee on the couch (he still does) or headbutt my hand when i'm trying to fill his food dish (yep, he still does). when i'm home and living in my own little $600 a month bachelor in guelph, i hope to get a cat from the humane society, preferably one over it's couch peeing and headbutting phases, aka 2 or 3 years old, maybe older. i just really enjoy the companionship of a pet which is probably why i will grow up to own five hundred surly tabbies and never marry.

oddly enough i cannot wait to go home now that i know it's really happening. i keep picturing what i'll do, those early morning walks for coffee and taking up a million hobbies. i have to-do lists for my to-do lists at this point. i want to learn mandarin and sewing and figure out how to bake a pie and knit a scarf. i think i can do anything now; living alone halfway across the world from what you know has a certain way of empowering you. funnily enough the only thing that now terrifies me is jumping back into the advertising industry. i'm afraid i won't be good enough or that i'm so out of touch with marketing that i'll fall flat on my face. who knows.

i am now an avid fan of neutral milk hotel, matt pond pa, and the new shins and against me! albums. i am also hooked on the 4400. i consume media faster than hz consumes mi fan.

i'm trying to make a diary/journal deal of my experiences here in china, and i have quite a few pages now of taped tickets and horrible poetry that only manages to wax pathetic. i wish i could write. i think i can i think i can i think i can.

i remain yours faithfully,

the consummate cat lady